I saw some tulips poking their heads out rather shyly in our flower bed. March here in the cold north can be so unpredictable. So, as excited as I was, I really wanted to get some soil or leaves to cover them up. As I sat there and breathe in the cold but refreshing air, I felt a sense of relief and excitement. The long cold winter is on its way out. Signs of life. Spring. A neighbor told me that robins are starting to come back.
With the change in season, other changes are in the air. I am convinced that I live in the "restless people capital" of the world. I am learning to be content and to live my life with the sense of peace. Maybe one day, we may happen to be the ones packing up and saying good-bye, but for now, we sit. It is okay. And for those who move on, we send them off with gratitude for the time they gave us here and with our well-wishes. Not with sadness or anger.
I realized that it takes a lot of energy to dwell on negative thoughts. We cannot change what life throws at us. I have spent too much time trying to change what I cannot change, and in the process getting wrapped up in negative thoughts and energy. When I do that, I end up missing out on all the beauty and opportunities the life as it is brings me. There are so many people to meet and to inspire me. So much beauty around me. So many people who needs to be touched by what I can offer. I am learning to let go and live each day for what it is, making the best of it. Not to be worried about what tomorrow will bring, because tomorrow may never come. One of the recent changes brought some of my friends to move away, and not being able to have a vegetable garden this coming summer. I tell myself, it's okay. I will get over it. If I am lucky, maybe I will have a small raised bed for a few things like lettuce and tomatoes. No point in getting angry.
It's good that I have been able to spend time with my elderly friends as well as a friend whose husband was paralyzed in an accident. It really gives me a new perspective. They are never bitter nor angry. Instead I sense peace, gratitude, and contentment. No regret. Amazing. Storms of life, they have seen and walked through plenty. But they are not beaten down. They are just like my tulips bravely standing tall looking to the sun in spite of the cold wind and unexpected snow in March. They will come up in all their glory no matter what the weather is tomorrow. I got a long way to go, but I like where my heart stands now and I like the person I will be because of this. I am starting to see it more clearly and little things do not seem to matter so much anymore. Peace.