Maya--Japan Bound

I just booked a plane ticket for Maya to go visit her grandparents in Japan this summer. She is ecstatic. 2 years ago, when this idea came up, and she was absolutely against it. Now, she has a permanent grin on her face and every now and then, she would say, "Thanks for letting me go to Japan, Mom". My heart is excited and terrified all at the same time. She is growing up faster than my heart would allow. I am so proud of her bravery. I am proud of her because I can trust her to take on such a big adventure at such a young age.

To be honest, I have not done a good job of teaching my children about their Japanese heritage. I don't speak Japanese to them. My kids cannot, for the life of them, use chopsticks. They are Canadians, through and through. Since she was very little, Maya has always wanted to go to Japan. The desire is so intense--more than just a little kid wanting to go to an amusement park or an ice cream shop. I could sense that she really wanted to know this part of herself --like a missing piece of the puzzle. I never knew if it was ever going to be possible for our family to go, but always hoped she could go while she is still young.

Although I am absolutely overwhelmed to let my little girl get on a plane all by herself to cross the ocean, I feel in my gut this is the right time and it will be an amazing opportunity.

Someone asked me the other day, when I was in Japan last. I responded, "oh about 10 years ago....in 1993". Wait a minute, that's 18 years ago! Sometimes, I long for the intense heat of the summer. I dream of showing my girls the Japanese countryside I grew up in. Catching cicadas and praying mantas and listening to the crickets at night. Going to get fresh peaches and fish that were just harvested/caught in the morning. The Hustle and bustle of the city centre. Food stands and fireworks.

What will Maya see? Who will she meet? I wonder if she will meet my neighbor who let me borrow the book, "Never Ending Story"? I am sure so much has changed but so much are still the same. As much as I want to be there to take her down my memory lane, I am glad she gets to go on her own. She will go without mom's agenda. She is free to decide what she wants to see and to experience Japan in ways that are meaningful to her.

We will look for books about Japan and make a list of things she wants to see and do. So far, she wants to go to Tokyo Disneyland. :) Maybe I might even give her a crash course on the language and how to use chopsticks.

Summer Activity List

The Summer Vacation is upon us. In order to keep my children occupied and happy, I thought I'd make a list of activities so we won't be sitting around going...."mom, we are bored!!" Here is my list. I am trying to keep it simple and cheap and yet fun. Living in a small town requires some creativity....and that is okay.

* Make postcards and send them to friends near and far

-this helps us keep connected to our friends. It will make friends happy. Encourages creativity as we will be making them. It will help kids learn how to address letters and learn to write and spell better.

*Make Tinfoil Hats

-just because. It's silly. It's fun. It's cheap.

*Splash Park

-because there is a new one in town and it's free. Also try the one in near by towns

*Library

-because they have air conditioning. My girls love reading.

*Take care of our flower & vegetable gardens

-Share the loot with neighbors and friends

*Sprinkler under the trampoline

-So so fun!

*Sleep on the trampoline

-I might regret saying this.....

*Cook with each of the kids

-So they can make a meal from start to finish.

*Giant Bubble Experiment

-found here

*Set up Maya's loom

-seriously, in 2 years, she made 2 projects because I'm too lazy to set it up for her.

*Study Constellation

-maybe we can do this while we are driving down to the States.

*Use our fire pit often

-gives us time for slow down visiting time

*Rag Curls...

-because they are girls and school nights don't allow this often.

*Go to the OCEAN

-Oregon coast....we are coming!

*Learn to play Yatzee

-I bought it a year ago and we still haven't opened it.

*Homemade ice cream

-dust off the old ice cream maker

*Family Movie Night

-my goal is to actually stay awake for the whole movie....

*Teach girls sewing

-I have my heart set on making these hats for my girls in the next week to welcome them to summer vacation.

*Lemonade Stand

-It's the symbol of childhood summer memory

*Go to the river

-because it is the closest thing to the ocean here and we love it there.

*Make friendship bracelets

-You just have to when you got girls.

*Looking forward to the lazy summer days.....Come by and join us in our adventure*

Almost 4.

4 seems so much bigger than 3. As she masters more skills and takes pride in her independence, there is a feeling of relief and panic mixed in one. Relief that she doesn't need me to do everything for her, but panic because like water, the childhood is running through my fingers.
I always wanted 3 kids. And there she was. She is nothing like her older sisters. She is spirited. She is unpredictable. To be honest, she has been the one that has most frequently challenged my patience and made me question my ability as a mother.
But perhaps because of her, I will be more patient. I will be more accepting of the unexpected. She will make me a better mother.

Ironic.

Mismatched socks. Fairy wings. A pair of silver mary janes. She takes me by the hand to shows me the world through so much innocence and excitement.

"Look mommy, Robins!"

"I love these flowers, mommy!"

"Worms!!!"
The world is a beautiful place through the eyes of a toddler.
This past year, two of our good friends became very ill. Tori was the one to pray for them. Everyday. Every chance she's got. She said some profound things in her prayers. We saw miracles and they are now healed and well.
It is a beautiful thing to watch your childen make this world a better place by just being who they are. I hope my eyes are open to see it, instead of focusing on the troubles and inconveniences.

I think tomorrow, we will walk to the park and I will push her on a swing high up in the air to hear her belly giggles.

Learning

You can teach a student a lesson for a day; but if you can teach him to learn by creating curiosity, he will continue the learning process as long as he lives.

~Clay P. Bedford

Sometimes, we must tell ourselves to slow down and look around. Listen to each other and talk. We are in such a hurry all the time.

During the month of February, our little town has been the sanctuary for Bohemian Waxwings. They are beautiful creatures. We have a bit of obsession about birds. If you didn't know, you may have just dismissed them or not even notice these beautiful birds. My girls and I took some time chasing them around town. One day, these birds decided to have a party in my front yard. They were there all day and we were able to get some photos and we took a look at them in the bird book. Maya is hoping to draw a picture of them. Now we know there are three different kinds of Waxwings. We have seen two of them. The last one being Japanese Waxwings, which we are quite certain, are the coolest of them all. ;)

Mona asked me one day, "Mom, where does the sidewalk end?" I didn't really know what she meant. I asked her to explain. She went into this elaborate story about what may be at the end of sidewalk. She thought perhaps it may end in Africa. I love her curiosity and imagination. So, I shared with her the poem "Where the Sidewalk Ends" by Shel Silverstein. According to the poem, we can find "the moon-bird rests from his flight to cool in the peppermint wind" at the end of sidewalk. Mona was beaming as she heard this. "What is a moon-bird?" "What does peppermint wind feel like?" Another opportunity for some learning and to stretch our imagination.

I believe that the learning becomes fun and meaningful when the information is absorbed within the context of real life. Some of my favorite moments with my girls have been like that. We may be cooking dinner together, weeding and watering the garden, or sitting on the hood of the car looking at the constellation. It doesn't have to be complicated. If we take the time to look around, we would find that the opportunities are plentiful.

The Last Few Days

We had the Scrabble tiles out the other day and my older girls were just spelling some words. Tori got in there and started lining up letters too. She'd try to name letters which of course, were all wrong. Then I thought, "I wonder if she can recognize letters for real?" So, I got a piece of paper and spelled her name out for her: "T-O-R-I". I asked her if she could pick out these letters out of Scrabble tiles. She did it at the first try. WOW. She then proceeded to write her name down. "R" was a bit tricky, but she did it. It became a game and she did this over and over for 2 days. Delighted. Then she wanted to know how to spell other names. Her sisters, parents and friends.

What I loved about that particular moment was that learning happened by Tori guiding herself. I didn't sit her down to teach her. Tori was in charge. She wanted to learn and she was ready and I was able to catch her in that moment when her curiosity met the learning opportunity. It was so natural and delightful.

These moments are like fuel. They encourage me and affirm me in my abilities as a mother and give me that little push to keep on parenting these sweet little people in my life. Parenting is delightful, but it can be rather mundane and exhausting....both mentally and physically.
My girls had 4 days off from school this week. I asked them to make a list of things they wanted to do during that time. We tried our best to get lots of things from the list accomplished. As parents, we dictate so much of their little life. They have so little say in what they may want to do. I am learning that in a safe environment of our home, we can slowly give them the opportunity to be in charge.

Mona wanted to cook dinner. She chose to make soup and biscuits. She cut the biscuits out with a heart-shaped cutter. Maya found a recipe for a cheese cake in one of her novels. She copied the recipe, got all the ingredients from the store and pretty much made the cake from start to finish all by herself. She surprised her dad with the cake because his birthday is coming up in a week. The cake was delicious!! She wanted to invite a friend over for a sleepover. They all wanted to spend their money at the book store, so we ventured out in the cold and we were glad we got out of the house. They all wanted "rag-curls".

When given the opportunity to choose and to be in charge, I saw my girls come alive. They got along better with each other and we all had lots of fun. They were so pleased and proud of what they had accomplished. A few things didn't get done, but perhaps, we will put that on the list for the next weekend.

Children and Food

I have three remarkably good eaters. They love all sorts of food. I am very proud of them and it is fun to take them out or to cook with them. However this did not come so easily. I am always disgusted when I go to restaurants and children's menus consist of chicken fingers and fries, cheese pizzas and ice cream. Where is the green stuff, I ask. Children do not like green stuff. Well, that is not true. My girls love the green stuff. My girls love olives and broccoli. My girls know what lentils are. Sushi, salmon, scallops, curry and spanakopita!! Quinoa burgers, lox on bagels and Calamari! Adults assume that children only eat chicken fingers. ugh.

Many years ago, I worked at a coffee shop. I remember this one customer. A grandmother taking her 5-yr-old grand daughter out for ice cream. The grandma said "which kind would you like?" The little girl hesitated. So many kinds to choose from! They asked me what was good. I told them if you like something fruity, try the raspberry sorbet. It's so good. I offered a sample. The little girl seemed interested. The grandmother turned up her nose and said "you wouldn't like it, dear. It isn't ice cream". and went on to order black cherry ice cream. The little girl didn't even get to choose!!

I realized it's so easy to do that though. Not just about the food, but all aspects of my interaction with my children. I must be careful to let them feel the freedom to choose, not making them feel like they need my approval.

Here are a couple of things I have enforced regarding food and my children. First, they are not allowed to say 'yuck'. They may tell me they didn't like something, but never 'yuck'. I find that to be very disrespectful to the person who cooked the food. They must try everything that have been offered. I encourage them not to write off any food they didn't like. I keep offering it to them and my kids have grown to love some food they didn't like when they were smaller. For example, Maya did not like avocados as a baby. Now she can't get enough. She has also recently learn to love hummus, but she is still working on rice crackers. She would say once in a while that she would like to try a little to see if her taste has changed. Bless her heart. I do not cater to them when I cook. What they see is what's for dinner. Also, I am always looking for ways to make our meals healthier and more economical. For instance, we stopped putting meat on our homemade pizzas. I made them vegetarian one day and asked them if they had missed the meat. Unanimous "No". Now, we only make vegetarian pizzas, and do you know what we put on our pizzas? Roasted garlic, spinach, red peppers, greek olives, mushrooms, onions, sun-dried tomatoes, fresh tomatoes and basil (In summer) and mozzarella cheese on homemade whole wheat crust. Go figure.

It's fun to share different food experiences with my children. We especially enjoy Ethnic food. We also have many dear friends who are vegetarians or have some dietary restrictions. We love sharing food with our friends. I am glad to say I don't have to wonder if there is going to be anything my kids can eat when we go out somewhere.

We all have different priorities and parenting styles. I am aware that this is not a huge priority in many families. It is something I felt was important for my family and chose to 'pick this battle'. For me it has been well worth it.

A New Chapter

Tori started Preschool last week. She is so excited. I too am very excited. The first day I dropped her off, I came home and sat in the car for a few minutes. I exhaled deeply and dialed Scott's cell phone number, "Hey, do you wanna go for breakfast?" I knew he couldn't. I wasn't disappointed. He laughed. I knew that he knew why I called. We laughed together. For the first time in nearly 10 years, I will have a moment to myself. Guilt free.

On one hand, I grieve the fact my kids are growing up, but on the other hand, I rejoice the fact they are growing up. I loved those early years of finger painting and mashed carrots. I loved my girls as newborns. I cried when my oldest started kindergarten. I loved those magical years of innocent wonder. I am not quite done with those years yet, but I can see that it is soon going to end. I can see that those sleepless nights are over. No more diapers.

I will still kiss my girls better and will still cuddle with them to read together, but it feels like we are entering a new phase. A new chapter. I have joined a choir and will be participating in a play (a small role in Guys and Dolls). I have been able to sew more. My girls will need me in very different ways now. We talk about friendships, faith, and choices they make. Our discussions are about more complex things. I enjoy seeing different strength develop in each one and to encourage in the things they are good at. I am amazed and proud when I see my girls making good choices. So proud and yet humbled. They are growing up with amazing characters in spite of me and my mistakes.

There are many things I want to do with those precious two and a half hours on Tuesdays and Thursdays. I would like to read more, sew more, paint more, write more.....but I know I probably shouldn't be too ambitious. I will probably vacuum the house and do the dishes. And that is okay. I will do that gladly. Right now, even to be able to vacuum alone is a treat. It's the quietness of the heart that I appreciate. It doesn't matter what I am doing. I hope that this will enable me to be a better mother also.

Reese's Rainbow

This is the time of year when we ask; how can we give abundantly?
I believe one way is by joining with family, friends and strangers that have the information to move forward, and give gifts that will make a world of difference in so many lives.
My friend Krista has signed up to be a Reese's Rainbow Christmas Warrior. Reese's Rainbow promotes the international adoption of children with Down syndrome. Krista has a precious little daughter with down syndrome, Ella. Please take the time to read the beautiful story of Ella, on her blog, One Beautiful Life.
Krista is an amazing advocate for these precious children. I would love to support Krista in her effort to raise some funds for Bennett. By raising money to offer adoption grants on waiting children, Reese's Rainbow is able to give adoptive families the extra financial help they need to bring a child with Down syndrome home from a miserable existence in overseas orphanages and institutions. Having worked with People with disabilities for most of my adult life, this is a cause that is close to my heart as well.
Click on the link below to read about this precious Bennett. You will read about what life is like for him as an orphan, who lives with down syndrome in Ukraine, and where he is headed. While you are visiting her blog, please notice big buttons on the right side, that will also provide you with a lot more information.
Giving abundantly even when we have only little. Though we have hope, when others do not. Small donations all add up tremendously. Krista has committed to raise $1000 before Christmas, but together, we can raise even more than $1000 and unite Bennett with his forever family soon. Thank you for reading and considering this. Wishing you all a festive season of Hope!

Bennett's Profile on Reeses's Rainbow

Maya

9 years ago, my life changed forever. Today, we celebrate her. 9 years old. Where did the time go? What can I say, in this small space, of all the wonder, all the amazing things about this little lady? I love her ability to look beyond herself, her sense of justice, her compassion, her ability to relate to people of all ages. She is a bright light to many who meet her.

I knew the moment I held her in my arms, she was someone very special. She is strong. She is loving. She is caring. I love her belly laugh. She laughed like that when she was a wee little baby. She still laughs the same. I am thankful for this treasure. My acorn. A small seed with great potential. A mighty oak she will be one day...giving shade for many who will sit under it.

I am excited for the days ahead to watch her grow, but a little sad to see her grow so fast. In 9 more years, she will be gone from my nest, although never too far from my heart. I love my life with my little girls.
Happy Happy 9th Birthday my little acorn. You are one of the most amazing human beings I have ever met. How blessed I am that you call me "Mommy".

Bringing the Ocean A Little Closer

We made some fantastic seashell mobiles with the girls today. I even used Scott's power tools. :) Only a week until they start school full time. Our evenings are getting cooler....even frost warning last night (insanity!!). Trying to enjoy these lazy summer days as much as we can. hillbilly Jillies has a wonderful step by step instructions on here if you are interested. I used some wooden beads and hemp string. Our shells have been collected at the Oregon Coast as well as there are some that came from East Coast Canada (friends brought back a bagful for the girls for taking care of their garden while they were away). East meets West mobiles :)

After making the mobiles, we still had many more seashells. I went down to the thrift store and found a large glass fish bowl and filled it up with the shells. I thought this makes a fantastic bookend.....

It's lovely having those wonderful reminders of the ocean in my home.

I Love Dandelions

I think they are the most wonderful flowers anyone can receive. You know you are loved with the most purest kind of love.

Here is something I wrote a while ago about dandelions.

A Surprise

Do you remember Charlotte? I still think of her sometimes. When I came home today, Scott showed me a robin's nest exactly the same spot where Charlotte once built her beautiful web. It is right beside my front door, the one I go through several times each day. The nest is huge. At least 8 inches wide. How is it that I haven't noticed this at all?

It hit me like a ton of bricks. I have been going through a bit of tough time with parenting Tori. She is strong willed and 'no' seems to be her favorite word at the moment. I feel like I have lost the joy of parenting. The spark. I pray to God that Tori will learn to obey. Day after day. I am exhausted. I am surviving but my patience is wearing thin and I am not the fun mom like I used to be. It is no surprise that I have walked by a robin's nest 2 inches away from my head everyday and missed it completely.....I have been bellybutton gazing.

The robin's nest reminded me of the time when we used to go for nature walks. Talk about insects and pick flowers. Sit on grass and make friendship bracelets. It really isn't that long ago and yet feels like another life time ago. It was a gentle reminder that I am still that mommy and that the mother is the heart of the home. I am no longer praying for Tori to be obedient. I am praying that I will find the key to Tori's heart. How to touch her spirit. How to connect with Tori.

Scott used a few nails to make sure the nest is secure. I wonder if they will come back and lay those beautiful blue eggs. I am looking forward to the summer (by the way, it snowed yesterday here!!). The lazy mornings and slower paced afternoons. I am looking forward to spending more time with my girls and getting to know them all over again.

Mona the Comic Relief

May 18th, 2010--Mona decided to go Trick Or Treating. God bless those wonderful neighbors. She got quite a haul. I told her she couldn't go again until Halloween. It's only cute once. But it was fun and Mona and her friends had the best day.

Mona said to me, "you know mom what I LOOOVE? "

"What is it, Mona?"

"I love Itchy-Bum noodles (as in Ichiban Noodles). I wish you would buy them more often"

Before I could explain why I rarely buy those evil noodles full of chemicals, we just bursted out laughing.....until we cried. I take life too seriously sometimes. It's good that I have my girls to lighten it up.

May

Mother's day. Love these girls. Love my Scott. Breakfast in bed. A boxful of little notes. I love my life. I am so spoiled.

Signs of spring everywhere....finally. We found these robin's egg shells on our front lawn the other day. I am taken by the amazing color. I can look at these empty shells all day. My girls are thrilled. We are keeping them in a little glass jar. I am so grateful to see how my girls are growing up with a sense of wonder and curiosity towards nature and world around them. We love walking together and discovering the world around us. I had a wonderful walk the other day while my kids picked dandelion bouquets for me and we sat and laughed at gophers poking their heads out of their little holes. Tori and I took a little bike ride to a garden centre and said 'hello' to some horses on the way.

I love the simplicity of this life. I am learning to take it slow and really savour it.

Growing Up

Yesterday, Mona declared, "I want to be a play school teacher when I grow up!" I was delighted and then exhaled a sigh of relief.

Mona is my middle child. She is a peace maker and is extremely easy going. She is kind and sweet. She is also easily persuaded and gets taken advantage of....A LOT. I really have to watch her interaction with siblings and friends because she gets pushed around. She is one of the sweetest children I have ever met.

Mona rarely expresses her own opinions. Her older sister wants to be a vet when she grows up. So did Mona. Her older sister's favorite color is green. So is Mona's. When we got the bunny (which was Mona's bunny), her older sister said, "what do you think, I think we should name him 'Spots'!" "Oh yes, that's a great idea..." said, Mona, although she really wanted to name him "Snowflake". She brings home the book order from school. She is counting out her allowance. She picks something out of the flyer. Her older sister walks by and says, "why don't WE get this?" which is not what she originally picked out. But she buys it anyways. Her older sister is never mean or malicious. She is the first born. And Mona is never disgruntled either. But sometimes I worry. What if when she is bigger, some kids may ask her everyday, "Buy me a chocolate bar with your money" or worse. I have seen it too often. The nicest kid gets taken advantage of.

"Mona, I think you would make a fantastic play school teacher... You are so kind and good at playing with little kids. I can't wait to see you become a wonderful Play school teacher". She wrapped her little arms around my neck. "That will be so much fun, Mommy. I love little kids".

Wellingtons, Rubber Boots and Galoshes

I heard my British friend Barry use the word "Wellingtons" this afternoon when he saw my children in their new rubber boots. I love the sound of the word, "Wellingtons". It sounds so polite and smart, but of course, in order to get the full effect, you must have British accent when you say, "wellingtons". It would sound very pretentious if I tried. I also love the word "Galoshes". I remember when I was a kid, I would walk through the puddles to get the water inside the boots so it made the sloshing sound of the water as I walked. The word "Galoshes" sounds like the perfect sound effect of the water filled rubber boots.

I was a bad mother last year. I didn't buy my girls any wellies. I had some sad sad girls. When I realized the importance of Wellies to small children, it was too late. There were no more puddles left in town. I learned my lesson. Yesterday, we finally got them rubber boots. There is something just very pleasing about wading through the deep muddy puddles with your perfectly sparkly wellies. I remember that feeling. Such a far away past and yet it feels like yesterday. My girls spent hours doing that today. Until of course, Tori peed and wet her pants. It definitely is one of those happy feelings of my childhood.

~The photo above is 4 years ago. Maya is 4 and Mona is almost 2 in it....WOW!~

Making Lemonade

Maya bashed her finger in the door last night. It's all bruised and blue. This morning, it was still throbbing and I could tell that she wanted to stay home. I felt terrible saying what I said. I think I was hard on her. I made her go to school. I told her that I know it hurts and she probably would want to stay home. Remember when Ranger had to wear that awful cone? He moped around for a few days, but eventually, he figured out how to scoop a tennis ball with the cone, throw it in the air and then catch it. He learned to make the best of it even though he was going through a tough time. I felt terrible. I want to be her hiding place. I wanted to hold her and tell her to stay home. She headed out the door with her throbbing hand up in the air (she said it hurts less) as if she has some questions--we kinda teased her about that too. I felt bad all day and wanted to walk over to school to go get her. When she returned, she was beaming. She told me how everyone helped her with small tasks she was unable to do, like doing up her zipper. It made her feel good to know people cared about her. she challenged herself to write with her left hand, which she thought was fun. She is planning to do a poll among her classmates to see who can guess when her fingernail is going to fall off and offer a prize. She had such a fun day. She chose to have a fun day. Tough love. I am glad she is learning to make lemonade with the lemon she's been handed. *sigh of relief*

Am I Crazy?

My day starts out with feeding 3 kids and 2 dogs. Vacuuming, sweeping and mopping of the dog hair and other debris created by my dependents. Our dogs are almost 12....I told myself I needed a break from pets after they pass on. And then yesterday, we added "Spots" to our family. I had about one hour to make up my mind if I wanted to keep her or not. How could you say no to those big brown eyes of a 5 yr old girl? So, I added "Potty training the bunny" to my chore list. Good thing my 2 yr old has been potty trained already. Who would have thought? I must be going crazy or just a little soft. Now, what is the average life expectancy of a rabbit? Truth be told, I kinda like her.....she is pretty cute.

What the Future May Hold

Each made so uniquely with gifts and strength. I wonder what you will be.....What I know is that I will love you no matter what the future may hold. The world is yours. The future is bright. You make this world a better place by being you.

"Don't ask yourself what the world needs. Ask yourself what makes you come alive and go do that - because what the world needs is people who have come alive." (Gil Bailie)

Valentine's Stuffie

Sunshine warming our cheeks through our kitchen window. It's still frosty outside. How can it be!? Learning that even though I am with the kids all day every day, it is still important to spend one-on-one time with each of them. This is a great project, but also teaching my 5 -yr-old how to sew buttons on.